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Midwifery Challenges: Our Difficulty Finding a Midwife

I was prepared for the morning sickness, the cravings, aversions, cramps, even the crazy pregnancy dreams… but what I had no idea of, is how hard our struggle to find a midwife would be.

Yes, there have been articles describing New Zealand’s shortage of midwives, The midwife crisis is realshould have been a giveaway, and while I’d seen a story about a Mum-to-be who “called dozens of midwives before she found one who could take her” I just didn’t think it would happen to me.

I must have contacted 30 midwives…

I too, contacted literally dozens of midwives, either by telephone, text or e-mail, hearing back from only one who had an opening to see me. The others must have been so busy, they didn’t even have time to respond – understandable when they’re terribly over-worked and under-resourced. I scoured ‘Find your midwife‘, called Birthcare and turned to Facebook groups to ask for help too. Exhausted, we were incredibly close to looking for a private obstetrician just because we actually needed someone.

And when we finally met with one, we were incredibly disappointed.

Thankfully, one midwife did respond to my request, and agreed to meet with us.

She spent the entire time worryingly telling my husband and I that we might be better to see a private obstetrician. I could understand some small kind of disclaimer about the difference between midwifery and private care, but the experience seemed to mostly consist of the midwife warning us that she would not be able to perform the services which half of all pregnant women need (caesarean, forceps or fonteuse delivery) and that if we used her, we’d just get an inexperienced registrar at the hospital, rather than an experienced doctor. Not only that, but the investment (approximately $5-6,000) in an obstetrician was “a small price to pay for a healthy baby” (as though a midwife could not deliver a healthy baby…?)

We left feeling disappointed and depleted. We knew she wouldn’t be our midwife, yet we had no other options at this point, but to keep searching. We weren’t being fussy. We didn’t have that luxury. We just wanted a midwife who at least gave us the confidence that we were in safe hands.

So, I contacted even more midwives…

Back to ‘Find your midwife’, back to Facebook, and then finally to friends, and friends of friends. Thank goodness, the latter worked, and she was exactly who we imagined, I knew from the moment we met that she was absolutely perfect for us.

It’s an incredibly sad time for both midwives and so many mums-to-be in New Zealand though. Midwives have appealed to the Government to urgently deal with a “crisis” in their sector, as they say pregnant women are struggling to get maternity care. I can only hope the situation improves.

If you are still searching for your lead maternity carer, I’ve put together a guide on How to Find a Midwife, as well as some questions to ask any potential LMCs you meet with.

Planning a Wedding in NZ: Cost, Checklists and Step by Step Guides

Planning a wedding in NZ? You’ve come to the right place. Over the past 8 years we have helped almost one million couples from New Zealand and Australia plan their weddings in a uniquely, personal, no-pressure and stress-free way.

Before you Start Planning Your Wedding in New Zealand

I suggest your first wedding planning steps are to:

Build Your Wedding Planning Toolkit

So you’ve got a list of Pinterest Boards as long as your arm, and probably quite a bundle of wedding magazines too, but to actually order all of your ideas into a cohesive, well-organised and easy to follow plan, you’re probably going to need a few wedding planning tools, at least a wedding budget and guest list template.

Most brides-to-be choose to create or buy a wedding binder or wedding planning book. During my engagement, I couldn’t find one that was perfect for everything I wanted, so I created the little white book wedding planner. It’s since been featured on CNN and voted the best wedding planner book, so I’m fairly confident you’ll love it too, but of course if you’d prefer to DIY, you can create a wedding planner book or binder from scratch too.

Work Out your Budget, Guest List and Wedding Date

Once you’ve worked out the basics with your fiance in terms of what’s important to you and your priorities, you will have to sit down for some tricky conversations and decisions around your wedding budget, your guest list and a tentative wedding date.

How to Choose your Wedding Vendors

I truly believe that those planning a New Zealand wedding are amongst the luckiest in the world. We have such incredible, and quite affordable, access to every picturesque type of venue imaginable, from beach, to lakeside, to mountain-top, and everywhere in between.
I’ve also put together a few articles to inspire your choice of wedding venue in New Zealand:

Exclusively for my subscribers, I also provide a venue selection guide, so make sure to subscribe.

Once you’ve Booked your Wedding Venue

Booking your wedding venue is a great feeling, it’s a huge task and it’s definitely the hardest to choose, and hardest to get right. The good news now, is that you can probably take it easy for a while, depending on whether you’ve chosen a DIY/Dry hire wedding venue, or a full service, all inclusive one.
Keep your wedding budget in mind as you continue, you may like to read How to Allocate Your Wedding Budget Remainder – an article specifically for once you’ve booked your wedding venue.
Now, you can have a look at some of the following articles to keep you on track, and don’t forget to keep planning in your little white book.

These are just a selection of what you’ll find in the wedding planning index.

take a look inside our best-selling wedding planner ​

explore the little white book​

download a sample of the little white book wedding planner to see examples of how to use the pages, and how it can help you plan your wedding.